Being connected to the resiliency of your true self is more powerful than any line of defense.
“Life is a path. You are here to grow.”
My Dad said this to me when I was 15 years old and it honestly changed my life.
I had just run away from my mother and was filled with both anguish and relief.
But his words offered me meaning. His words meant the pain I was bearing had purpose - and that I could use it to grow and develop as a person. From that moment forward, I looked at every struggle as an opportunity to grow.
And I had to do plenty of it. At 15, I was already fiercely defended. I couldn’t cry or be vulnerable in front of other people. Throughout my life, I had to slowly peel back those layers of defense - starting with my first therapist at age 18. Over time, I was able to meet the fear and shame that existed underneath my defensive reactions.
I overcame decades of chronic guilt - for leaving my mother and other relationships - because somewhere I also learned that I was responsible for taking care of other people.
And then in my 30s, I encountered anxiety I didn’t even realize I had that drove a lot of my behaviors. This anxiety became a portal for a more embodied awareness of myself. I became more grounded from within and less preoccupied with those around me.
As a highly sensitive, emotional person, my feelings have always been stormy, deep, and unpredictable. Here in my 40s, taking responsibility for myself - my feelings, my needs - has never felt so empowering. This doesn’t mean I don’t bring my needs to my partner (my needs do belong there as well).
But by building my resilience to shame, and by rooting more mindfully in my body, I can finally contain my own energy and bring the best of me to my relationships.
I found a way to integrate the traumas of my childhood by getting really present in the now and by increasing my capacity to lean in to uncomfortable places and stay.
I found a whole new way of being and was able to see how my emotions - when embodied - offered me a deeper way of knowing.
If you are ready to wake up, to break open, to push back on the negative voices, and to finally see yourself and your life clearly, reach out to me. I bring a personal and in-depth understanding of growth, attachment, the power of emotion, and the search for the true self to my work.